Friday, 14 September 2012

Dog Blog, Top Ten Dachshund Facts!


Puddles D Rainwater.

Top Ten Fun Dachshund Facts!

The Dachshund’s a dog of German descent,
Whose tail never knew where his front end went?

1 They say word ‘Dachshund’ means badger dog as Dachshunds were originally bred to hunt badgers in Germany. This is not true, the Dachshund is German for dat hound. The Dat-hund is called dat hound because it is just that, dat hound. The breed is sometimes called a dash-hound due to their ability to dash everywhere, particularly when some food may have been dropped. They are also called Weiner dogs due to the fact that they wee and Doxie which is German for doggy. They should never be called a hotdog as A/ they are not hot (temperature wise) and B/ they do not fit in a bun but they are a Hot Dog. We hope we have now have put you straight about the name Dat Hound!

2 Dachshund are born speaking German. Quickly they grow up to be bi-lingual. The first word you must learn is the word nein. Nein is a word most peeps think means no, however in the world of the Dat Hound it means nine. Nine is the doxies’ favourite number. Thus when you are reprimanding your doxie with the no word you are really offering your doglet nine pets on the head, nine treats, nine walkies etc etc. Therefore to avoid confusion you should never use the no/nein word to your weiner. Yes or Ya on the other hand is quite acceptable and will not result in any confusion whatsoever. Thus to re-cap never say no always say yes.



3 No to be confused with the word nein is the word mine which is a word dear to the heart of any Doxie. There are several simple rules which apply to the use of the word ‘mine’.

Dachshund Rules Or Ode To Reuben!


1. If I like it, it's mine.
2. If it's in my mouth, it's mine.
3. If I can take it from you, it's mine.
4. If I had it a little while ago, it's mine.
5. If it's mine, it must never appear to be yours in any way.
6. If I'm chewing something, all the pieces are mine.
7. If it looks just like mine, it is mine.
8. If I saw it first, it's mine.
9. If I saw it last, it’s mine.
10. If you are playing with something and you put it down, 
it automatically becomes mine.
All Mine! Oh and if it’s broken it’s yours!




4 The term Napoleon Complex was not coined for General Bonaparte but for one of the dachshunds he owned on the island of Corsica, who he referred to as Napoleon. This miniature male was very dominant and picked unprovoked fights with large dogs and often winning.

This little dog with ten inch clearance,
Presents a ludicrous appearance,
His legs are bowed, his feet turn out,
He gives us much to laugh about.

He's two dogs long, a half dog high,
In spite of which he's quick and spry,
So at his funny build don't smirk,-
It's perfect for his special work.

For Dachshund plays a hero's role,
In going down a badger's hole,
A badger is a savage fighter,
A vicious scratcher and a biter.

And folks who call him ‘dash-hound’ show,
Their ignorance and do not know,
That dox-hoont is his proper name,
In Germany from whence he came.

5 Cleopatra, Plato, Picasso, Napoleon, Queen Victoria, Joan Crawford, Marlon Brando, Clark Gable, Errol Flynn, and John Wayne have all owned dachshunds. 


6 The dachshund has the senses of a skilled hunter. Their noses are able to pick scents that are up to a week old. The hearing of a dachshund is four times more sensitive than that of a human.

You might be a dachshund

if you’re tail is longer than you are tall,
if you’ve heard all the sausage dog jokes a 87 gazillion times each,
if every Halloween your human drags out the Hot Dog costume,
if you have trouble seeing over the grass if Mr.Mower is more than a couple of days late,
if you’d rather take a nap under your favorite blanket than harass the family cat,
if you’re constantly referred to by strangers as the ‘wiener dog’,
if you have trouble finding sweaters with sleeves that you don’t trip on while walking,
if you’d rather leave a special present for your human in the middle of the hallway than trample through wet cold grass in the morning,
if you think the world should revolve around you,
if the world actually does revolve around you!


7 Dachshunds are ingenious and clever dogs that attempt to train their masters. They are naturally curious which makes them funny to observe and they are lively, energetic, and prone to loud barking.


8 The Dachshund can be rash, bold, and impressively courageous. They can be seen constantly in a tireless pursuit of curiosities and misadventures.


Life lessons learned from a Dachshund:

1. If you stare at someone long enough, eventually you'll get what you want.
2. Don't go out without ID.
3. Be direct with people; let them know exactly how you feel by piddling on their shoes.
4. Be aware of when to hold your tongue, and when to use it.
5. Leave room in your schedule for a good nap.
6. Always give people a friendly greeting. A cold nose in the crotch is most effective.
7. When you do something wrong, always take responsibility (as soon as you're dragged shamefully out from under the bed).
8. If it's not wet and sloppy, it's not a real kiss.



9 The Dachshund's defining feature is its long body and short legs. This breed comes in three varieties, including wirehaired, shorthaired and long haired. Dachshunds belong to the AKC hound group.


How Dachshunds and Men are the same:

1. Both take up too much space on the bed.
2. Both have irrational fears about vacuum cleaning.
3. Both mark their territory.
4. Neither tells you what's bothering them.
5. The smaller ones tend to be more nervous.
6. Both have an inordinate fascination with the remote control.
7. Neither does any dishes.
8. Both fart shamelessly.
9. Neither of them notice when you get your hair cut.
10. Both like dominance games.
11. Both are suspicious of the postman.
12. Neither understands what you see in cats.
  
10 Although loving and extremely loyal the stubborn sausage dog can sometimes be difficult to train. They tend to be a bit high-spirited, and they love to dig, so be sure to watch your garden for holes.

A smooth-haired Dachshund and a long-haired Dachshund were walking down the street. The smooth turned to the longhair and complained, “My life is such a mess. My owner is mean, my girlfriend is having an affair with a wirehair and I’m as nervous as a cat." “Why don’t you go talk it over with a psychiatrist?” asked the longhair. “I can’t,” replied the smooth. “I’m not allowed on the couch.”


All pictures belong to our top model Puddles D Rainwater over at 3 Doxies.

Thank you Puddles for allowing us to show off all of your lovely gorgeousness!

The long and the short of it...don’t you just love them!







43 comments:

  1. Yes I love doxies, at least nine or more of them. I have a lot of good things to learn from them. I can't imagine the thought of Miss Puddles swallowing a whole possum. That is pretty scary, she would have to be rolled back to the house I bet. Joan Crawford had one (shudder), the poor doggy. Mine, mine, mine, that is like the best advice ever and I would never think to insult any of my pals by referring to them as a hot dog. Thank you for this wealth of information. I now have a much greater understanding of many of my pals.

    Loveys Sasha

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  2. We thought that was Puddles.

    Dachshunds sound a lot like scotties!

    XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy

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  3. The vacuum and men, so true, so true. Love your backpack!

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  4. Thanks for all the helpful Dachshund information!

    Sam

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  5. OMG THIS WAS SO WONDERFUL! These dogs are so smart. My first encounter with one was quite comical. I was emotionally distraught one day at a friend's house and we were talking. Her dachshund, who never really paid much attention to me, sat on my lap and looked up at me in tears and then nuzzled into my lap. It was rather creepy, but cute at the same time, for this dog was COMFORTING ME!!!!!!!!!

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  6. Don't swallow your bubble gum (pic 3) lol....Have a nice Friday Molly and best wishes to all Dachshunds, they are gorgeous!!!

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  7. Hi Molly,

    Thank you for the very interesting info on Dat Hund,be afraid be very afraid. Such a little thing....up and down the country police forces are getting rid of law enforment k9s to be replaced by the German speaking Doxies! HALT DIN ICH SUPER DOXIE! Just the thought should have the under world shaking in their beds.

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  8. BRAVO- your analysis is spot on!!!! My babies act just as you described! Laughing so hard am crying! Thank you from the bottom of my heart!!!!

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  9. Well Molly.... Now that explains quite a bit about us and why we do some of the things we do. I'm going to print this out and post it on our refridge so everyone can read it. Maybe, just maybe we'll get nine meals because of it.

    And your model Puddles did a great job!

    Hugs,
    Lily Belle & Muffin

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  10. Laughing so hard that I am crying! Puddles is the perfect model for your thesis too!

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  11. OH now those rules explain a lot. Kelly is part long haired dachshund, and she thinks that everything is hers. Much to the dismay of our new dog, Brooks.
    I recognized Puddles blue toes.

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  12. This is the most wonderful post ever on Dachies! And specially cause it was Puddles! Thank you so much!
    Lovies to all Dachies, Miss Mindy

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  13. Hey that is my drinking buddy Puddles! I now understand her much better. So much makes sense now.
    Blessings,
    Goose

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  14. That was just great Molly, We use to have a Minature long haired one, It's little face, looked quite like yours, really cute. He was a complete nutter and would take on all the huge dogs.. :) Have a great Furiday xx00xx

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  15. This is great Molly. Last time I featured Dachshunds, I had Nola lend me her pretty pictures. Good thing you have Reuben as your sponsor.

    Huggies and Cheese,

    Haopee

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  16. Molly - we always learn so much from your posts:) And yes, we knew that was our pal Puddles - unmistakably gorgeous Puddles.

    Woos - Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

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  17. MOL MOL MOL
    Molly what a great post about Doxie-tudes!! Mom and Dad were owned by a Doxie for nearly 11 years so they 200% agree with every line. Puddles D. Rainwater is Doxie Purrfection for sure.

    Hugs Madi your BFFF

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  18. I am secretly a doxie. I just love love love them!

    Nora

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  19. Hehehehehe...girl, you nailed dis postie fur sures! I tries to tell my mum dat I can't understand hers cuz I only know german...she doesn't buy it though.
    It is true we likes to hunt, my vet wants me to flush out a fox at his house. OMD, dat would be fun but mum was all like HECK no....kill joy she is.

    Puddles
    PS: Thanks fur lettin' me be your model

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  20. OMD OMD... What a SUPER POST... It HAD to be... since OUR PUDDLES is featured. I gotta admit that Ernie and I are pretty guilty of all that stuffs. We give your post 8 paws up.

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  21. Thanks for setting us straight about Dachshunds, Molly! Puddles is a gorgeous and versatile model. :-)

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  22. Puddles is a true Doxie not only does she have her peeps trained she has all of blogville trained as well. Bawhahahhaaa! She is my best pal!

    I didn't know you had a Pip in your life, too! I guess both of us (Pips) are pretty lucky!

    Your pal, Pip

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  23. Wow! You taught us everything!! Thanks, there was so much we never knew!

    Your friends,

    Murphy & Stanley

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  24. Possessive not! lol ... The Dachshund are gorgeous! Have a great weekend;)

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  25. Now THAT answers many questions I had about Miss Puddles....

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  26. We didn´t know Dachshund were so wise... We´ll never make fun of them again, we promise.

    Hugs and kisses (and likcs),
    Afri and Tuna

    PS: Our human can´t stop laughing, nice post!

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  27. Heehee! Now that was interesting! Puddles is just so darn pretty isn't she! :)

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  28. Hi Y'all,

    I'm so glad y'all came by! I just wanted to thank y'all for stoppin' to visit and say "hi".

    Hope y'all are havin' a wonderful week.

    ROFBOL!!! Too funny Molly!

    Y'all come back now,
    Hawk aka BrownDog

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  29. This is the perfect post and Puddles is the perfect example! Thank you for the smiles, Molly!

    Love ya lots,
    Mitch and Molly

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  30. adorable but the "rules" apply to ALL dogs! Same for the men!

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  31. Ótimas informações!!!!
    Beijos e tudo de bom pra você *-*
    Maravilhoso fim de semana!
    Divirta-se!!!

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  32. Very interesting info. I have a few doxie friends but didn't know much about them -- other than the dachshund rules, of course. I know they get sick of being called wiener dogs!

    your pal,
    Garth

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  33. Dachshunds are great little dogs! I especially love Reuben's rules:)
    Cotton

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  34. Oh wow, you have answered all of our questions about Dachshunds.
    Our human is laughing really hard right now and we find it extremely embarrassing so please ignore her.
    That Miss Puddles makes a really great model doesn't she. We are glad to see she decided on a stunt double for the flying scene however.

    Purrs,
    Cindi Lou & The Kitty Krew

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  35. Hey Molly,

    You sure are funny buddy AND very clever, loved this post!!!

    I checked out no. 6 and I can safely say that I'm definitely not a Dachshund!! :)

    Let's hope you don't get the Hot Dog costume this year :)

    Hope you're having a fun day :)

    Your pal Snoopy :)

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  36. Who knew?

    Love and licks, Winnie

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  37. Molly, this is the most fascinating and also true thing I ever has read about the beauties that is us, dachshunds. The Dachshund Rules is completely correct; when the peoples and other dogs is going to learn those? I think they needs to go back to schools. Speaking of schools, Puddles is looking pretty good here - I guess she is all done with her hanging-over from the other day? Or maybe these was Photoshopped to hide the effects of a wild drunken joyride in the pizza truck? Keep up the good journalisms, Molly, you always tells it like it is! You is a good reporter.

    Love,
    Reuben

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  38. Yes, that's Puddles! But you forgot to mention her love of Cheetos, Beer and riding around in the laundry basket...I think all Dachshunds like those things.

    Wyatt

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  39. Ruthie will stare at me forever if she wants something!

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  40. OMG...I'm ROFLing :)
    This is fantastic!!! BOL!!!!!!

    But what's the deal about us being difficult to train? I ride Swiss trains all the time :)

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